grrrrrrrrl stuff

(image by tim walker)

so today has been one of those days. there's a lot going on at work, at home, with my car (see below) and my family. also its later in the month--if you catch my drift. my life feels exactly like this photo, un-tameable, wild and overwhelming. underneath i can see that there's potential, but right at this moment i need some serious weed-b-gon.

i digress...

i think i am handling things pretty well considering and i think i've given myself too much credit too quickly and by too quickly i mean at all. i usually like to just put my head down in times like these and plug away at what needs to get done. kinda like i am waiting for the rain to pass tonight before i go out tonight.

i had a very long day, an emotional one. where i almost lost it at work, my car 's engine light was on again and the mechanics were acting like i made it all up (see below). i snapped at my mother for infringing on my saturday, was frustrated with the small amount of packing i've done for my move this weekend and my procrastinating re: roy's going away present.

now some of you are reading this with real issues, and i know what's plaguing me isn't anything compared to serious problems (i am insanely lucky with all of the ingredients i've aforementioned). granted. but when you're in the thick of things, anything can be overwhelming and exhausting.

*sigh*

i only mention the above because when i finally got home from the gym and the equally tiring walk home in bikram-yoga-esque heat, i found a GIANT cockroach on my front door, smiling at me ( i swear i heard it snicker). it was like the fates were mocking me. now, i'm no wuss but it was the last straw. that poor sucker didn't even know what hit it (or kicked it, rather) as i beat the crap out of it with my Reefs. in tears, i called the elevator attendant to come help me dispose of the body in some Coroleone family way.

it was cathartic. fuck the rain, i'm ready to go out!